What a week!

This past Tuesday was my 6 month wedding anniversary, today is the 4 month anniversary of the worst day of my life.


The day I lost something I loved very much. I lost a handful of people that I actually considered friends and over 100 maybe even 200 dogs that I treated as if they were my own. I lost a happiness that I can not get back. I really haven't been the same since, I feel like part of me has been missing these last four months. I've felt so lost so hurt. I lost a belief in myself and my goals. I felt like god had a plan for me and four months ago it got derailed. Somebody made a mistake that would set me off the path I was supposed to be on and I have no idea when I'll make it back on. 


I wish these people and dogs knew that I thought about them everyday. I would kill to see them one more time. I just wish I had the courage to do so. I get so attached to the dogs I work with its not even funny. 


Its weird that at the 1,2 and 3 months anniversary I felt different than I did now. It feels so long ago. So much has changed since then, that's probably why. 


ugh. fml sometimes. I wished I had it all figured out. I really hope in the next year or two things will change for the better.